You covered in salsa con queso would take care of all of my cravings right now
we walked in to her beating him with a broom while he was trying to sweep ramen into a box. there were packing peanuts everywhere.
We don't have a lot of plans besides weed and cake
Drinking down Plan B with a 5 hour energy. Winding down welcome week in style.
I think you're going to have to drive me to white haven. I don't know if my brain can handle having my mom drop me off at a strip club.
She is watching her grandpa for the day and the dude just whipped it out and started jerking off while watching the View.
This stranger told me I should "start playing for the other team" and then continued to talk to me about the joys of being a lesbian
Do not shit in our house. There is no TP. I am walking to get more, if I do not return, I have probably died of dysentery after my last wagon wheel got stuck in a gulch. Tell Martha and Lou Ann that I love them, and that I passed away doing the Lord's work.
No! Last time I got hit with a beer bottle
Haha, Tuesday man
The only person I have to bring is crazy hospital guy
HE'S NOT INVITED!!!
Netflix, eggnog, and bed? Maybe some hand stuff?
You came in last night, ate an entire avocado in silence, and then told me I should never accept rides from strangers. Not sure I even want to know what happened to you last night!
I woke up with a black eye and a buttplug...not sure I really want to know what happened.
Dude, they hit that lizard part of my brain that tells me to fuck people.
Preach sister.
Bowls and Harry Potter this morning. I guess work isn't so bad after all
Randomize