you kept screaming that dicks were growing out of your back and then you started crying cause they were so far from your vag
could you get any more awkward?
I woke up 25 minutes ago and have been high for 20. Impressive?
If it makes you feel better, I doubt anything could survive in your uterus.
Hey bring in backup. its going to take a lot more beer than we think to fill up the water bed...
I had to jump out of her car while it was moving enough said
All you need to know is that isn't jizz
I think I've had 45 beers today though So things are looking up.
These girls just walked into this party as reverse cowgirls... Wearing cowboy clothes all backwards
Well sort of got busted by a cop while having sex outside, so your call
I settled on "Merry Christmas! Btw you may have chlamydia". I thought a nice holiday greeting would soften the blow
I have got to stop telling people I was almost a prositute every time I drink
I don't know. Seeing the vagina stretched out beyond normal proportions is like watching your favorite superhero die.
I threw up all of my purple drank and thats really important
I wear drunk well.
Just saw a commercial for non alcoholic baileys cream. WHAT THE HELL IS THE POINT?!
Randomize
