i just googled 'classy porn'. high, low, i dunno i just got bored of cum shots.
ew. I made a sandwich, and the cheese reminded me of her vagina
I just spent a chunk of my Christmas money on Plan B. I don't think that's what my relatives had mind when they said "spend it wisely", but hey, it was a good investment considering the bad life choices i made last night.
The only thing I can remember you saying is "I won't cut pizza like this when I'm older."
all ten of us were sitting in his room with the lights off and staring at his colorful moving screensaver for two hours. That high.
My teachers should feel privileged to see me this morning, after the amount of alcohol I consumed last night.
Pretty sure he sprained my tongue. This is why you don't hook up with gingers.
Good idea. You gotta take care of your vagina. She takes care of you. Pay it forward.
Ok not good, my info has definitely been submitted to this sugar daddy website before.
yeah, I don't think I'm getting into the baseball game tonight. The security guard definitely saw me bowl over that child.
The guy at the rodeo just told me "if ya don't say none, ya don't get none". What the hell does that mean?
Im pretty sure you just got hit on by a gay cowboy.....
I just won 200$ from Bar Karaoke, for singing the "Sailor Moon" theme song, and then the Pokemon theme song, also known as the motherfucking ANTHEM OF POKEMON MASTERS LIKE ME. I HAD TO REPRESENT.
He fucked me in his tour van, I feel like an official groupie.... Except I don't even listen to his band.
Tell me why i have 60 matches in 72 hours on tinder. Can i sell my tinder account like people used to sell their myspace pages and tumblrs when they had a lot of followers? Is that a thing?
Of course I fucked him. He was wearing a rainbow cock sock and cowboy boots.
Randomize
