who do I fuck, the girl waiting for me upstairs or her roomate making me mac and cheese right now?? This is the single hardest decision I've always wanted to have to make
No see this is how It goes: guys will fuck virgin girls. But girls don't really want to fuck virgin guys. So you're good have no fear.
I woke up to him climbing naked through my bedroom window with a bottle of jd in his hand. Of course I had sex with him.
Your like the Mozart of blow jobs, you make every other girl seem like cheesy elevator music.
should my break up email to my English professor be in MLA format?
I always figured rock bottom would've involved more hookers
I wish! That ended in 2001 when we all got collectively band from the Settle Inn. As a group we are also band from social events at the zoo. It's impressive really.
I'm doing shots of jagger in dixi cups and making a lesson plan for my 8th grader summer school class. My life is so close to adulthood I can taste it
IT'S LIKE SHE TAKES SECRET KUNG FU CUNT LESSONS AND THEN BRUCE LEES ALL OVER EVERYONE.
The worst decision I made last night was allowing myself to be duct taped to the ceiling
I walked around with red solo cups on my feet, weeds tied around my neck and a tree in my hand
I stopped hooking up with him and ran to the bathroom to throw up. He saw me throwing up and it made him throw up
HOW DO YOU FORGET TO FINISH WINE
It's only 9 and these two girls are already walking around Walmart barefoot and holding their heels. WE NEED TO STEP IT UP.
You drank the pool water to get rid of your hiccups
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