I was 10 minutes late leaving for lunch today because I couldn't lose a boner. It is impossible to tuck it when your shirt is tucked in...gotta quit facebook stalking hot chicks at work
ID DO HER
SHE HAS LUMPS OF DEODORANT IN HER ARMPIT, I THINK ONE FELL IN YOUR DRINK
my hippie aunt just sent me some brownies with a note saying not to eat them under any circumstances until finals are over. excited.
I just bought condoms at Big Lots. please save this text so you can laugh at me in 9 months
You love him. Dinosaurs. Math. Sex.
hey you forgot your wet suit in my room you can come grab it whenever
he definitely had sex before you were fully potty trained.
Its not low standards. We're more of like a self esteem camp for average girls
It is very possible that having sex with you just now just got me into Yale
Topenga is going to be back on TV. Finally my fantasy of her being a milf in junior high has come full circle.
just got caught singing "pop that pussy" by a very old man at work. *face palm*
That hot guy just got to class and he's eating a bagel sandwich. I dunno which I'm more attracted to
Played never have I ever with high schoolers today. Needless to say they brought up threesomes so I had to make a judgement call and decided to not put my finger down
I'm sure there's been a weekend in 2014 we were sober... Clearly it wasn't fun, bc I can't recall it. Point proven, alcohol is key.
I just want you to know that i deffinately saw the baby clothes, and didn't freak out and still had sex with him. I'm going to hell.
Randomize