trying to figure out who visited the hillshire farms website enough for it to be in my top sites.
some random kid just walked into our apartment with two cases... I don't know who he is but I like him
every single one of us blacked out. we woke up the next morning and it was like the night never happened. IT'S STILL A MYSTERY
Heads up. We filled your kiddie pool with kool-aid and vodka. Things are about to get Out. Of. Hand. Quickly.
I'm pretty sure he's lost all respect for me. it probably happened somewhere around the time i had officially slept with every single one of his friends..
There are too many people on this bus for it to be even REMOTELY okay that I'm wearing a puke covered sweater
His "hunger Strike for change" lasted 4 days. Hi welcome to my coke binge last weekend....not impressed
Shared a jello shot with her mom last night. then she tucked me in and took of my shoes for me
Oh god the guy I took underwear from at the bar is trying to add me as a friend on facebook now.
... Already stepped in vomit and got a dirty look from a fat in a neck brace
it was really awkward meeting your mom for the first time while i was still wearing the condom we were using.
omg just made cake vodka jello shots, sooooo excited
dear god these taste like death. death and sprinkles
no strings attached, like you could fuck him and then throw him off a building right after
I dropped my pants and she just stared until she asked how is that even possible? Best night ever lmao
Its mothers day... Can my present be an orgasm...for once?
Randomize