i cvme to yuor rooom...wherer are youf?
please be gone before i get back
So there's 10 guys in this picture..I've made out with 5 of them. does this make me a slut?
eh 50% isn't bad..i'd say 80% is slut material.
He spent most of his night trying to convince people that he had changed and was no longer a sleazebag...he had his nut hanging out of his pants about an hour later.
Funny how often beer equates to second degree burns on some portion of my body.
just got in my apt...and theres jungle juice here i left from over a month ago..this could be interesting...or deadly
Just saw you drinking out of a flask on national tv. I've never been more proud of you
siamese drinking twins saturday is a go ... bring duct tape.
Your either lost or getting food, if your lost find me a girl on your way back, if your getting food grab me a double cheese
Brown or brunette? Ketchup or mustard?
I love you bro
Imma do me. And by that, I mean I'm going to walk across campus still drunk at 9am on a Tuesday.
Is it weird to say that Kobe reminds me of a wise brontosaurus?
My gynaecologist hit my g-spot today by accident and for some reason I went "at least someone found it" VERY AWKWARD
The gas station was closed so we found old PBR and played Edward Nalgene Hands instead
He fucked the hangover right out of me. That good.
Nope. I'm an adult now. I can successfully avoid to vomit in defiance of the porcelain god\n
I just want to get high and watch Dr. Pimple Popper.
Randomize
