wasted. watching meteors, awesome idea i ever had, see 2 for every 1 with ma double vision
Turns out vomit takes off spray tan.
Working out to an exercise video on OnDemand. Also, drinking beer and eating cream cheese with a side of bagel in between stretches.
I may still return these pants. Depends how much they smell like alcohol by tmrw morning. I've already spilled once.
Just got my period. This just makes my beach escapade totally even that much more ok.
No, I googled it. Apparently, male thongs are the next snuggy and a lot of guys love wearing them for the support.
Codeine + Boredom = Sprinting between my front and back door.
You couldn't find your shoe so you introduced yourself as Cinderella for the rest of the night.
Ahh that explains the text from creepy mike saying he would be my prince charming.
I had 800 mg of ibuprofen 2 b vitamins and I'm pounding water like I'm trying to win a hazing
... why is there a bottle of pee on my headboard?
Basically, what i'm trying to say is, if you don't have something, excuse or gift, to satisfy my anger i am going to look you in the eye and piss on the floor.
Hahaha I can already see the arrest warrants. It's gonna be beautiful. I'll get them framed.
either i huffed spraypaint or ate out that makeup artist. you decide.
SINCE WHEN WAS USING A FROZEN WATER BOTTLE ATTACHED TO A ROPE AS A THROWING WEAPON A GOOD IDEA??
omg last night while walking home from your house I stole a seatless bike and carried it into my next door neighbors kitchen.. we just looked It up online it's an antique and worth $500 dollars
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