Just gargled Fireball to get the fish taco taste out of my mouth. Almost as good as gum.
Courtney? Is that you? I have pictures of this very same night.
I wish I could drop acid with the muppets
im in Michaels with rachel and i see a little boy jumping around and waving a rainbow pompom. Welcome to our team little one
She was asian and in a relationship... my two weaknesses
By the way, i got bored and just started putting my balls on every object in your room. One at a time.
Chicken wings don't come back up an through your nose as easily as you'd think
I left my bra and a book at his place. He's a hot Scandinavian who is into physics and computers - had to step up my game.
Fuck you, you can't judge me til you've smelt my boobs.
Once again being low on toilet paper is forcing us into another round of our favorite game - toilet paper roulette - where there can only be 1 winner. Maybe.
I don't want to resort to having sex with people that actually like me.
i made out with his shirt. MDMA, man.
I party with great urgency now.
We should form a club for all of us that have stabbed a sibling with a fork!
I can barely operate my hands; what makes you think I can operate my dick
Randomize
