he doesn't have near as many excuses as you..and his are usually pretty legit. like "i'm having a baby." that's pretty legit.
I tried to throw up out of my window but I forgot there was a mesh screen.
i forgot to tell you that olivia sent me a text yesterday that the mormon girl got caught with weed in her vagina at school
Just found out the guy that gave me herpes died. now everytime I get a flare up, it'll be like he's coming back to say hello
So the bartender just told me that there was numerous people who saw me having sex on the rooftop last weekend. +1
If you fuck her, Im going to call you and I want you to cough 2 times.
Ill trade u your bra for a run to the liquor store...
Don't I can pass these orgasm blushes off as sunburn for much longer...
Cant really say how it happened but i woke up in the middle of the night and somehow pissed all over connors dad
Last night you made me help you pick the raisins out of a kashi bar and acted like it was the most important thing to ever happen to you or our friendship
You cried for a while then lifted lots of weights then cady's ex put glitter on your tits and then you took a nap. I got you pizza and brought you home. Nothing too exciting.
Hey I'm coming to get my gin do you want a good luck blowjob for your exam tmrw
If I walk downstairs and Kelly is fucking in the laundry room again I'm gonna die
You start to question your morals when you wake up at 430 and there's three people naked...that you don't no
We are never doing shots of gin. Never again.
I'm pretty sure that's exactly what we're doing.
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