And then falling down drunk the next morning, concussing yourself and splitting your head open?
That was pretty sad, but you more than made up for it by using "concussing" in a sentence
He asked me how my body knew that a month was up when it was time for my period.
We're going to play a drinking game. It's called "Senior Year of College."
i think i was tempted to text while we were making out. like i remember holding my phone up behind his head and just staring at it.
The kid in the park, who was on a leash I might add, looked at us and yelled "stranger danger" before hiding behind his dad
woke up to see a man wearing a sailor hat and covered in vomit sneaking out the door. Epic night indeed.
We HAVE another bedroom, it's not like I was gunna chain you into the closet. Often.
We walked in and someone handed her an unopened bottle of jack with her name on it. She's like a drunken celebrity.
So I just bought e from my sophomore home ec teacher. How's your weekend going?
Oh my god and he smells like heaven wrapped in a beard of knowledge
I had to rename my dildo. I met a little kid who named his teddy bear the same name. It just felt wrong.
May the power of my ass compel you!!
My Sexting was not on an AP level
i woke up this morning with a fake eyeball in my pocket
Add tweezing eyebrows to the list of things not to do while on adderol....
Randomize