I just googled "semen solvent" and got nothing. there has to be something that will wash this shit off!
I see a marketing opportunity
I think you came in my ear last night and I had to pick it out infront of my kids in class today
I'm applying temporary tattoos with green beer, this is the life.
We just filmed our own version of iron chef. The secret ingreient was whisky.
What did you cook with whisky?
We started a fire.
You were fucked up like a footballbat trying to eat gum off your shoe. And that wasn't even the nights lowest point.
It hits you later. Like when you wake up on the floor under a puzzle later.
Did u see the proverb she left as a comment on my picture?
I'm gonna have sex with my clothes on and I'll know everyone there so I'll be in my comfort zone
Tell me why I woke up spooning a hamburger like it was a teddy bear.
I still count it as showing your tits. Even though the wall was the only one who saw anything. Your boyfriend was pissed.
Debating whether the Plan B I had this morning would go under breakfast or lunch in my food log.
I feel very compelled to cut off the person's ears that is sitting in front of me
Currently playing charity bingo with coworkers so if u were ever gonna send a dick pic now is the time
Blacked out and Irish exited last night. At dinner. On a Sunday.
No idea who's grandma but people were just running around naked
Randomize
