Hi, I just found this phone under my seat at a brewers game and seeing as you're entered in as 'fillllatio' I figured I'd ask you if you know the illiterate ass who owns this phone. Thanks :)
and i do it all in one night. I'm like santa but a whore.
after he fucked me and not his girlfriend, i told him to be a gentleman and close his eyes as i ran to the bathroom naked. so sweet.
your definition of "gentleman" is so absurd.
So recap time do u remember biting that girls hand?
Look, if he's not the brother with three nipples, I'm just not interested.
See what happens chris. I told u not to invite her over. Now shes on her way to jail and were stuck with two pomeranians.
Yeah thats cool. We can play the alphabet game while doing bumps of coke in the back of his volswagon
He said to use 30 racks as chairs and then drink til we fall thru the box
Part of me really wants this picture, but the other part of me knows if he is really this drunk, he could be sodomizing a lamp and not know it
We fucked on a kid's slide, my vagina is singing praises of being used
I think we've reached the point in the summer were we need to go back to school. I was so bored yesterday I nearly bought blow dart gun.
I just tried to order ice cream on my bagel. I think I should just call it
I woke up to some strange woman rubbing peanut butter on my thighs
i made out with his shirt. MDMA, man.
welp, we watched the human centipede high last night and my mind literally shut down, when i came to all i could hear was mel saying EAT EAT HIS SHIT
Randomize