Saw a guy smoking a cig holding it with a fork and driving WTF?
I just googled "whats above a trillion", thats how busy I am at work.
Things to remember: Girls don't appreciate it when you yell "Beast Mode!" when switching to doggy style.
is it bad that i regret hanging out with a girl tonight because that means i have less time to sit on youtube watching xmen cartoons?
dude they were twins that means they were both only 17
I just showed my boobs to our astate representative hahahahahahha
I think I might.. possibly.. like a Justin Bieber song.
I think you might... possibly... have sprouted a vagina.
someone just broke into my class and invited everyone to the bar ...now we're filling out a police report. awesome.
thought i was the most hungover person in class until i saw a kid puke into his bookbag...he wins
No mixer. Vodka in yogurt?
Just yelled out loud for someone to buy me a drink, 30 seconds later random guy on grindr asks what I'm drinking.
There's a 98% chance your drink will taste like rohypnol
It's okay, big boobs are better than running.
She came into the salon and said, "Don't judge me. Yes that's cum in my hair and I want a shampoo, cut and style."
the day i stop sending you hentai screenshots is the day i actually act like an adult, and TRUST ME. THAT AINT HAPPENING ANYTIME SOON.
When you start lapping your martini like a cat it's time to go home. Partys over.
Randomize