i'm starting to get pissed at how pandora is trying to force coldplay on me
I was like, "um, that's my butthole."
I think the world might be a better place if everyone was capable of having open relationships.
just had to take a 4 hour nap to write a one page paper. its obviously the week after winter break.
It will be a surprise...all i can say is stripper clown
We've started doing pot butter shots. WHY AREN'T U HERE
I'll pull you in a wagon. You'll have a sash and a crown on and we'll sing "All the Single Ladies"
One of my students in my 8am class brought me a Tim Hortons cup with a bloody Mary in it. Clearly, I didn't manage to look not drunk when I ran into him at Denny's at 4am. Who decided to let me teach?
Finally washing the shoe scuff marks off my front windshield :( bye bye memories
Congratulations, you've begun to unfuck your life.
Then that is decided. Fuck away my little bunny rabbit.
she texted me 'with freud,' which i thought was drunk for 'i'm with my friend.' but nope, she was actually on a statue of the psychologist sigmund freud.
It was so small.
Tiny. Got to love sexting. Imagine finding out the old fashioned way.
When he said he lived in a closet I thought he meant his room was really small or something... But he actually has a queen size mattress on the floor of his roomates walk-in closet.
I’ve gone two rounds already this morning and I’m ready for a third. The moon is in the house of sluticus hornius.
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