I took shrooms, thc and molly but its okay i'm surrounded by freaks
Raise your hand if you bought 2 annoying girls shots of water. CLOWNS.
I found the orange juice, it was hiding in the vodka...trickster.
Skanksgiving break is awesome already... pilgrim and indian roleplay tonight.
I'm handcuffed to the toilet. Don't ask
ALSO, I NEED TO BORROW A CAT. ASAP
I thought my dog was a polar bear. I kept asking how the north pole was this time of year.
I knew no one else would have gone along with it since it's morally wrong and probably illegal. You said, "Yes. And let's add fireworks."
I work nights. I sleep in. I take online classes. And fuck bad bitches. I'd say those are some perks to grad school.
Gays age differently than straights. 29 is like 45 in gay years. Next year I'll be in adult diapers and applying for medicaid.
I accused him of not drinking enough alcohol and eating tacos after midnight. I was sober and he's not a gremlin. I would say bad.
I'm really going to need you to stop yelling Campari.
I guess you never know how much of an impact you have on someone until you sleep with their cousin
I just want to trace his tattoos with my tongue
Soooo you're telling me you support us groom's men giving lap dances to willing patrons?
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