are we going to glenview for practice??
(3 hrs later) aids
where r u? what is story? im way too high right now
I went to blockbuster, where I always go when I need to soul searching
Despondent, hopeless, I decide on vantage point, because I vaguely resemble matthew fox (let me believe this, please)
It was cheaper to buy then rent, so now I'm stuck w/ a wretched hangover and I own this shit movie
Good face, no body. And apparently her vagina is related to chewbaca.
What should our trivia night team be named?
Define Statutory
it can't be normal that my body odor smells like fries
There is nacho cheese and blood everywhere.
She straight up told me, "I don't care if he films as long as he's quiet." You sure you can't find the camera?
Showed up physical therapy hammered. The therapist just says this isnt part of the program.
If magic marker is safe for kids, it should be safe for cats...right?
Is it bad that I'm using the photo I took for my fake ID as my linkedin profile pic?
hey u leave my anime porn out of this
It's hard to talk dirty with a mouth full of peanut butter
After the bar we stopped to Meijer where I found myself singing little mermaid while rubbing a pack of hotdogs on my face..
I'm not sure you count what happened last night as sex.
Have you ever thought, hey maybe the reason we were togather that long was because I was drunk the whole relationship?
Randomize
