So my teacher figured out I made a drinking game out of her lecture. Once my drink was gone she let us out. Happy St. Patricks day class. Your welcome
sooo my mom just yelled up the stairs " you left your bowl down by the computer"....aaand for a second I forgot cereal bowls still existed
youre just mad i got the high score on the breathalyzer
She soaked the fruit in vodka for ten minutes and then mixed it with normal fruit and sherbert icecream. It was called "lottery fruit".
It's been two weeks and I still have carpet burns on my knees. Well done.
Why is my drynk life bleeding into my real life
My week is over as of 8pm tonight, and I'm herpes free...Let's rage
I woke up naked on his boat with a cowboy hat on with a boat cover over me... Thank you tequila!
My alarm went off and I went straight for your dick. That's dedication.
Hey, how are you?
No. You're dead to me, you hamster stealing slutbag.
I'm in jersey with marbles.. He's blasted about to fuck a manatee and his entire family is trying to stop it. His mother punched me in the chest for not trying hard enough
I'm dying of laughter, but I'm also just dying
Send help
I'm literally naked with a whole pizza in my lap sitting in my chair.
Heyyyy, naked guy in your kitchen, can i ask you a quick question about a legal situation in pb??
is it still considered wake n bake if you wake up at 2 pm?
Randomize