Where is the hickey?
your youtube search consisted of "food slideshow" and "the angry beavers"
morning after pill = breakfast in bed
What I wanna know is who took a picture eiffel towering her?
it was really awkward..i thought he had two dicks, but later realized it was jsut his roommate
He's sobering up. It was really bad for like 45 minutes. He cried while telling me how he pictured us eating hotdogs on the beach together.
she crawled under her car and passed out. Unfortunately her feet were sticking out and someone called 911 because they thought she had been run over.
He told me the escort brought him pizza. Can something be sad and awesome at the same time ?
There are eight sets of guys I've made out with who have the same name. It's like noah's ark in my mouth.
Well it's been 24 hours and I still feel like a mammoth sat on my balls
I'm 11 for 13 getting drunker than the person who's birthday it is
Nope, can't do it. It's a snowball effect. Today, leggings as pants. Tomorrow, female hitler. Natural progression.
i mean i'm drinking free wine with lesbians and listening to sinead oconnor so i'm not sure who won that breakup
Walked in on my roommate covering his dick in blue frosting. Am staying with my folks for the Forth. See you Monday if the brain bleach works.
ready for a night of bad decisions, horrible moral standards, and an unhealthy amount of illegal substances.
Randomize