And, I saw Emily's panties. How? She doesn't sit like a lady.
Don't really want to talk about it. You were right. She had a whole jar of toenail clippings on her nightstand that she chews on "when her fingernails are too short." Direct quote.
so i decided to listen to you and went ahead and slept with him. you owe me 3 minutes
doing washington apple shots with my mom. sunday afternoons suddenly got so much better.
All I remember is holding on to the elevator asking it politely to stop spinning
i'm reaslly not drunk enough to wtch the fat lesbian on my floor brng another fat lesbian dressed up as a bloody nurse into her room at 2am
You paid at the door and they gave you a straw for the kiddie pool full of booze.
After a bit there were two girls who got naked and liquor wrestled. I don't think it was planned.
I just look @ having a child spit on you as another form of birth control. I think my ovaries just tied themselves in a knot.
I mean I'm into guys with money but more into guys I'm actually attracted to
yeah i guess i'd rather he was hot than rich
wow i don't know if that qualifies as growing up but if it does i'm all in
The highlight of my night was when you proclaimed that the man standing next to you smelt like grape medicine...
whatever bro. i had ice cream and whiskey for breakfast and its noon. this is the second worst christmas ever.
I've only hooked up with engineers this year and it may be the best future financial decision I've ever made
Executive decision.... we are cuddling naked
Also Fuck you Stephen King and Fuck the horse you rode in on, making me cry In front of my coworkers.
Come on in. I'm butt naked, in the kitchen, eating ice pops
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