It's hipsters with their motorcycle cop mustaches, moccasins, douchey irony, and department stores to supply their independent conformity
Something's gotta give!
so far i wrote 500 words for a paper on sean paul performing we be burnin..i can officially do anything on adderral
I think the best part was when you jumped over me naked.
and being hungover still at 4 in the afternoon is NOT "having allergies"
I don't go on dates. I watch tv and play with dicks. dinner is a situation.
Three guys came up to me at the bar and started dancing on me, while screaming "Johnson's girl." That's the last time I sleep with a freshmen.
i got two bottles of merlot and sorrows to drown, you in??
You misunderstood me....i wasnt asking and it is not negotiable
You're making this sound more like a hostage situation than a booty call.
Just heard the girl at the bar cuss her bf out and order a long island ice tea. Going to give it 5 min then I'm going in. See you on the other side.
Oh yes there is. Now I'm the sad one. Please organize my life. And I will demoralize yours.
It all started because he put my damn phone in his pants. By his crotch nonetheless.
No sorry. I may be a happy drunk but my gag reflux is an angry drunk.
This guy is selling weed on the train. Like... Straight up. No fucks given.
That broad from the bar put her name in my phone as "The girl I'm going to marry in 10 years".
I made him cum so hard he couldn't play video games for like an hour. I've never been more proud of myself.
Randomize