he wants to bone in the snuggie
p.s. this guy just tipped me with ecstasy pills. is this real life
Why does my right nut always hang lower than my left nut?
i used the phrase horny rhinos in my paper. i hope my teacher appreciates the size of my balls
May or may not have found my way onto a stripper bus. To Chicago.
It looks alright. The blow up doll is in the microwave, and she has forks in her ass
I'm going to a foam party and gonna grind someones dick off hayy
Apparently william has a "couch montage"...an album of facebook photos of himself on different couches in various states of happiness and despair. A heartwrenching journey through what was clearly a significant part of his life. I'd mock him more but I think the fact that I looked through it means he's already won
Guess who just got out of a ticket because the cop liked her costume? THIS GIRL.
Living in the dorms has served one purpose and one purpose only for me: to teach me that pooping in public bathrooms is okay and that I can do it
That was the night, like, my hair caught on fire...
You are the best. Or certainly adequate for tempering my unholy desires.
That's the nicest thing you've ever said to me.
He took my necklace off while we were 69ing. His tongue never stopped moving either. Take that, guys who can't figure out how bras work.
He's eating me out right now. That's how bad he is.
How do you confess that you've had phone sex with your fiancé's brother's ex-girlfriend's new guy she's dating who has also slept with your best friend?
Randomize
