you need to leave class get on facebook and start untagging IMMEDIATELY
When I got to his place, he served wine and cheese and made me sit on the balcony while he read his poetry to me. He cockblocked himself.
A good ear swabbing is more orgasmic than sex with him
being alone eating nachos and drinking from a giant munchen beermug really isnt that sad
She's a virgin AND a minister's daughter. We're one schoolgirl outfit from the dear penthouse trifecta
Had to awkwardly dig through all my fake ID's to get my real one so I could vote.......Model citizen over here.
You're the only person that can successfully use titties and Jesus in the same sentence.
The usual, im laying out. Ipod on shuffle, Large spray bottle to cool myself of and a smaller one filled with chilled vodka. I can spray the vodka right in my mouth without even opening my eyes. THIS IS LIVING....
I just want school to he over so we can build a big tent, do drugs inside it, and watch cartoons until the sun comes up.
That's all I've ever wanted.
please, i've had weekends with less dignity than this.
Oh we were great hosts that night. We made sure to leave all the beds open by passing out on the bathroom floors instead.
You know it was one hell of a night when you need to use your own thong to wipe cum off your face.
So I've reached a new low. After completing my walk of shame and being told "see you around", I took off my heels to discover he had came in my shoe.
Ryan. I woke up. At the neighbors house. And by the neighbors. I mean the ones to the north. The ones that hate us. Please call me. I am so confused and you are gone
At the neighbors house?! Like in it or outside???
In it on the fucking couch. No idea how i got here.
Only good thing about the 50 Shades is that it is now completely OK to call a credit card co to dispute the charge for nipple clamps that didnt arrive.
Randomize
