need another drink. this is the easiest way
i jus pukd everywherw but i took a showr, come cuddle
i'm going to look back at this as the time of my life when i casually dated that autistic guy
You guys crashed sarahs vespa into a snowbank and its still there. not cool.
Apparently riding the dog like its a small horse is frowned upon in this establishment
I was to the point where my socks were drenched in ranch dressing
Disregard the shoes in the freezer.
I'm just gonna use that pot butter as dip for chips. That's fat, American AND stoner!
He deadlifted me and I came just a little at the apex
I didn't pop out of a cake in a speedo with diagrams
In case that's what u were picturing
i dont know whats worse..that i woke up in a gorilla suit or that its covered in peanut butter
He pulled out a coupon for $2.50 off the crab cakes and expected us to share that as a meal. Is that the kind of person you really see me dating?
Do you remember when I didn't post that pic of you fucking an avocado on your boss' desk? Can you return the favour?
It isn't about the beer pong. It is about the destruction of the patriarchy.
Starting to realize that fucking everyone I come across isn't the most... "adult"... coping method.
Randomize
