I just Googled "how to lose weight but still be an alcoholic."
Just saw a Mexican guy pushing a stroller with 3 twelve packs of corona in it with a toddler struggling to keep up on foot behind him
hanging on that rope, lady gaga looks exactly like a used tampon
all i know is that if they can hide that much blood in her outfit, they definitely could have hid a penis
it was all downhill after the free blackjack taco
the last time i saw him was an hour he was floating face down in a pool... but i'm sure he's fine.
I think u should go home and go to bed. If u get arrested in the Ohio river u go to jail in Kentucky. Nobody wants to go to jail in KY.
We decided we needed a drinks fridge in our bathroom.
I found the hair cut I want on the girl in the porno I'm watching. now really sure how to show my stylist.
Well, I wanted to be you for Halloween but I couldn't fit seven dicks in my mouth.
Tried to ride the mechanical bull pants less, got punched for making out with some lesbians wife, and you tipped the bartender with a can of skoal.
I regret nothing
You're always so generous when it comes to your dick.
i repeatedly had to ask him if he was into this because he kept talking about random things while i jerked him off. i got annoyed and in order to annoy him back, i told him i wanted to watch him do it. he also talked about basketball WHILE cumming. NEVER AGAIN.
dude girls our age are getting married and having babies and I still can't figure out how to defrost my hotpockets
He started making out with my boobs. I didn't know whether to be proud of my boobs or ashamed of my mouth.
And I got shut down by a ginger. It was a weird night
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