I understand how i shit in my shoes, but explain why you were wearing them.
they had a keg party to fund her abortion.
Is it standard protocol to defriend someone after they give you chlamydia?
so i just drove past a racoon and a kid on a long board... god i love 4am white castle runs
I just opened up the mens room door to a dude pissing in the urinal and pointing at himself in the mirror
For a second, I wondered if I could smoke pizza.
they described our state of being as looking similar to a crime scene....you were on the ground and i was running around screaming.
I found a horn on the street but it's okay I disinfected it with vodka
If there's so much of a hint of a whisper from somebody I didn't tell personally, I will cut off your balls with a chainsaw, cauterize the wound with a flaming rusty spoon, feed your balls to your dog, and feed them to you when he shits them out, capiche?
Handcuffed our DD to a naked stripper don't think he will try to sneak out
He can pick locks you know
That's the reason for the naked stripper
Bacardi 151 is like a past nightmare I'm still curious about
I was doing good, then they gave me free shots
I ordered from the drive thru as i was peeing on the menu
Is it still sex if there's no nudity, no orgasms, but the neighbors bang on the wall and ask you to stop? I've honestly forgotten.
I have cats now. Five of them.
Have you considered starting a global domination firm?
Randomize
