Yes, I fucked her, no she wasn't that loose, yes she caused more drama than a 14 year old girl
Drinking wine. Reading twilight. On a Friday night. Biggest loser contest. First Place.
all we did was drink wine and talk about how people who dont have facebook dont exist.
dude, seriously he just sucked the milk out of the dogs breast and swallowed it... for $20, wtf....?
I either just got cockblocked or saved from a lengthy court case so I'm kinda conflicted about how my night went.
I don't remember much but I remember it was a unanimous decision that Santa was indeed real and Cait's stripping somehow proved this.
My roommate is trying to suck beer out of the rug.
Purse pizza: the pizza you buy before the club, and you eat on the train home. I thought you knew me by now!
He's living a porn movie. He's slept with a waitress at her work for lunch, a bar tender at the bar that night, and the cleaning lady the next morning.
Sit down my child. It's time you were told of my famous loss-of-virginity story entitled, "The Penis that Never Could."
My gay card got upgraded to platinum status today.
ten seconds after he was done making out with the blonde, he rips off his jacket and screamed "Goddamn it, you know I like brunettes"
I have never seen someone so pissed at getting some. i called dibs so fuck him
But, if I start dating you brother, I can't talk to you about the sex anymore!! Like... Can we talk about it anonymously?! I just won't use his name.
He looks like an accountant with a secret kinky candy filled center.
I think I'm gunna glue a sign to my head that says "WAKE ME UP BEFORE 7!" And go to sleep and hope a kind passer by wakes me up for my exam .
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