My gyno actually laughed when I told her about his penis size.
I called him Han Solo during sex, he looked at me like he was mortified then I realized he came.
Taljing aboutpenisrs w gerruly ska pops
the recent google searches were "were can i buy a porn horse, why does my heart hurt after drinking, and orlando's teen night..." your thought process perplexes me
she both took care of me and took advantage of me. it was BEAUTIFUL.
She's singing So Happy Together to her burrito, I want to be on her level.
It's pretty bad that I know he's opening his door from the way it squeaks because I have snuck out of his room so many times this semester...
After four attempts, his condom would not flush. I had to remove it with salad tongs.
In the middle of having sex, she said "if we continue, we're dating." I then pulled out and sat in the corner, naked. I deserve a Medal of Honor.
And by go well you mean everyone's hammered right?
Yupp. And someone's bleeding
Bathtub drinking tim. I have no pool so I work with what I have
But theres a keg here and me gusta
Dude, double fisting packs of Ramen saved my life last night
I was hooking up with him and then someone banged on the door and shouted "When you get the chance, will you put the weed on the veranda?"
Went to open youtube this morning, and the last search was "ten hours of whale sounds" Best pillow talk ever!
Randomize