I went out, and slept with my sunglasses on
we were making out and he got up to change his pants. I wonder what would happen if i took my shirt off.
Omg i either met the gayest dude ever or my next boyfriend
Lol. Awesome. Seriously though, I need you focused next year. We're gone have a lot of drinking and stupid nonsense to do, and I don't want dumb shit like responsibility to get in my fucking way.
I had to wash my hair with conditioner because my sister got hammered and gave the dog a 3am sprinkler bath with my shampoo.
I'm auditing financial statements and ur growing weed this is bullshit how did this happen to me
His buddy came running in the room after we had sex, and started "sponging" the sweat off my forehead with his sport wristband.
ill dress up as a sperm donor and you can go as the cup....
You haven't demanded nudes today. You alright?
Dude so help me god I WILL weigh a penis one day
Just sitting at dinner with my dad...simultaneously texting "daddy" to confirm saturday's spanking and telling another guy to get condoms before Im done with dinner. Don't know when I got so ate up but I'm loving it. You?
Regretting asking you what you were doing.
Wait, but now I'm curious. In what position were y'all when the cops came? Were you guys butt ass naked in the car? 😂😂
Also I ordered a dildo and I'm not sure if I want it still, so there might be a free dildo in your future
New Orleans is just like you. Dirty but beautiful and will always have a special place in my heart
I'm smoking and watching the Muppets Treasure Island. Where are you?
Something about that statement reminds me just how much of a role model you are, sis.
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