He disabled his match.com account in front of me
My only options right now are Herpes, Gay, or Vanilla.
Wow my backseat really seemed a lot bigger when we were 16
I don't understand how people can have that much vomit in them
one of the cashiers from Kroger is eating at my kitchen table and nobody knows why.
She loves me even though she knows all Ive done. Shes kind of like jesus.
Is it a step in the wrong direction to ask my parents for a kegerator for graduation?
Shotgunned a beer while taking a bath.
Lol I just left. He's funny and he's cute. Downside: he thinks he can outdrink us
A girl just told me she printed out my pictures and taped them on her wall. I have to stop sleeping with virgins.
I'm having a hard time existing right now. When I figure out how it works ill be over.
Help everyone's hot
Men are hot women are hot non-binary people are hot aliens are hot
I need a good cry or an orgasm and neither of them are gonna happen to me and i'm so frustrated
Woke up in a house I don't know, with someone else's pants on, and wolverine hair, to my girlfriend yelling on the phone about the 4 girls I made out with last
I once left mine in my bra and I forgot and I didn't notice it was there until it vibrated.
Randomize
