It was not a dingleberry, it was a dinglemelon
dude, when you're random girl from last night came down the stairs this morning she fell all the way down. I laughed. She just walked out. I hope shes ok. Tell her I give her a 10 for that landing though.
i stalked him back to the creation of his facebook in november 2008. that bad.
Jesus Christ, she just started playing Enya and is humming along to it. Way, way, way too hungover to deal with her shitty taste in music
The swelling on my elbow and tongue means I may have cockblocked myself.
It's been two weeks and I still have carpet burns on my knees. Well done.
Whoevers house this is has only beer and cream cheese in the fridge. Thats the diet im gonna go on
Watch the news tonight. They interviewed me about a fire. I was high as balls so it should be entertaining.
It's my vagina- remember its magical and yes I just did mini spirit fingers
omg how embarrassing to not hear the delivery person knocking because you're singing "where are you Pizza" to the tune of "where are you christmas" too loudly
I just felt emotion and I'm not okay with it
I am a delicate flower. A fucked up, drunk, horny, pants pissing, delicate little flower.
I think putting on real pants was half my issue with today
We were covered in sweat and glitter, making out onstage, in front of everyone. I think it was a good night.
You know you're drunk when you have to be picked up out of a bathtub.
Randomize
