covered in glitter, my cheek hurts, and theres a handprint on my face. Would i do it again. Absolutly
'hiiiigh' is saved in my t9 for a reason
dont ever smoke after you drink again... i dont think ive ever seen...or heard of someone throwing up and farting at the same time. that is, if you were farting.
He paid me to blow him while doing a handstand. Does that make me a whore or just a budding gymnast?
Tomorrow, you will get a text, and it will bE spelled right, that's me yo, certify ya soon
How do I discreetly dispose of sex toy packaging that is recyclable? What to do...what to do?
I'm just over here all sober hanging with two high people talking about how they're "free-spirited stallions."
She started telling me about this odd patch of smooth skin under her boobs. Not sure if she was hitting on me or looking for free advise from a doctor...
I mean, I still played with her tits for like 20min tho.
I made out with my former step mother's best friend. Only knew the connection when they both showed up together at the bar.
& I just realized there is no vomit smiley. There needs to be a vomit smiley
Antibacterial soap and prayers does not for spermicide make
After we finished having phone sex he proceeded to serenade me with Ave Maria. It was magical.
I'm good. Got my nipples pierced and threw my back out. 🙌
OMG LOOK AT THAT PIECE OF MAN
I haven’t trained for this.
but next to his bed he has a bible, and on the bible he has a pbr coaster and a condom. how can i stay mad at that? Its amazing.
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