I took chris brown's side in the conversation ... cut to me not getting laid tonight
I'm pretty sure God is rooting for me with this two gf thing
As a side note, my abs are sore. Most likely cause? Orgasms. Thank you.
You didn't want to have sex last night because you said your grandpa just died and you didn't want him watching..
the fact that i fell through a skylight is the least humiliating part of the night
btw good call for not making out for a pitcher of vodka, this hangover is bad enough
WTF WHY ARE YOU STILL NOT DOING A BEER BONG?! THE TOILET CLOG CAN WAIT
This is no lauging matter. Huge cock equals great sex. Marriage to huge cock equals great life.
It's just a matter of time. The ball is in my court. Soon to be in her mouth.
In that case, if you come anywhere near my house you can expect to be chased down various streets by a half naked me wielding a baseball bat. No, I am not giving you my address.
Why so serious bruh
she made me cum so hard I dislocated my jaw. I'm keeping her
I'm scared because his knowledge of star trek is turning me on
Now that it's over, I can finally say it and not feel bad,dude. Her mustache is better than yours.
If I could I'd magically teleport drugs and alcohol to you. Like a bad decision fairy.
and then she asked if she could shave my junk
and howd that go?
can you pick me up from the hospital?
Randomize