My booty call said shes done doing the walk of shame. Wtf is that?
It's what anyone that sleeps with you, specifically, does when they leave. Some do it even when they just think of you.
You peed for a solid 5 minutes last night and turned around halfway through to give everyone watching a thumbs up
I dont think yelling "Grab your dicks, time for pics!" helped your case either.
Every fourth of July I get sentimental when I think back to the one where we drove around baked off our asses crashing multiple cookouts listening to Team America's "America, Fuck Yea" on repeat. I miss us.
just saw someone in just a bathrobe not even tied shut run to the bathroom with a facefull of cum. Someone had a good night
CORAL IS FAR MORE RED THAN HER LIPS RED
Oh god you're Sonnet 130 drunk, aren't you.
Take a good hard look at your life. And the number of 18-20 year olds that you have made out with in the last 6 months... and then keep doing whatever the fuck you want.
it's just not right when you're boyfriend has a nicer ass than you do.
I need a priest, doctor, and therapist after this weekend.
You came walking in the backyard at 10am, in cowboy boots, a new shirt, and had no money,....we lost you for 15 hours....i think you just need a camera crew, or an assistant. IMPRESSED!
Sangria Flip Cup was probably one of our worse drunken decisions
I'm going to make you a sign to put on your penis to ward others off
Nothing says "Happy New Year" like having to shit into a plastic bag.
my nurturing instincts told me to take his clothes off
I’m going to have to rewatch all of them. Drugs, man.
I'm laying backwards. On the stairs. Eating carrots. And drinking from a captain Morgan bottle.
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