So my shaver died while I was trimming...ya know. And now it is half way done. I don't think there's currently any aesthetic in keeping it this way...
there was a trapeze. enough said
better yet, through the bookshelves. like an intellectual glory hole
i will trade you pizza and a blowjob for a fifth of vodka.
do i get to eat the pizza while you give me the blowjob?
His penis without viagra is what breaks my heart.
No like you fell onto the fence. I don't even know how you got into the fenced in area.
And now for everyone's least favorite sport... Drunk babysitting.
You screamed "There's a potato in my anus" and proceeded to attempt to grind with the bouncer. Also, I'm pretty sure our Chem teacher was in the same bar as us.
How was the picnic?
We played softball, except our team sucked. In one hand was a mitt, the other a beer.
Why didn't you put them down?
No beer left behind.
There is a midget driving a powered tricycle around town. I am not drunk, stoned, or lying.
I think if you have sex on the couch it will psychologically damage it.
Naked. naked and bneed help.
Why is there a slipper full of piss in my bedroom?
Ugh. He got her for secret santa. Idk what to get. Idk what she's into.
... other people's boyfriends.
sorry bout the carpet, but you DID call it "blackout punch" not "don't vom on my floor punch"
Randomize
