Don't you send me to vm
If for any reason you were wondering if i was going to vomit at the airport today, the answer is yes.
At least he's not married... I hate Halloween hookups
He went bowling in his bathroom.. And shattered the toilet.
Watched a women out our tannin salon literally fight police because she was getting arrested for trying to drunkenly fight the tanning salon owner...we need to step up our day drinking this is shameful.
Like I had no idea he knew how to play girls the way he played me. His major is chemistry for christ's sake.
Does anyone know why "math wizard" is written on my arm?
I noticed a trail of vomit coming up the drive way. You must be home
I definitely think in addition to buying paint ball guns this summer we should invest in a breathalyzer. That way every drunk night turns into a competition, who can blow over the legal limit more. The loser gets shot while hungover. Shit goes hand in hand if you ask me.
I got picked up after "I just threw up in my face". Then I had very specific instructions involving the bathtub.
Jesus Christ that hit just spoke to so many levels of my soul. It's caressing them softly
I'm ordering dildos in a santa hat. You?
I was going to try being motivated today. But then I took a hit while still in bed.
You can’t homewreck what the Lord hath brought together.
He made me pay for half of dinner. Fucking feminist revolution.
Randomize
