is it bad that i regret hanging out with a girl tonight because that means i have less time to sit on youtube watching xmen cartoons?
Thanksgiving. A stoners favorite holiday
he has 3 profile pictures up and all of them are him riding jet skis
he rubbed his balls on my face to wake me up.. this friends with benefits thing is getting out of hand.
that's not even the weird part though. he already knew where the bathroom was, he might have been here before..
Taking my tights off outside the club to give them to the homeless man was my contribution to humanity. The fact that it was snowing just made me feel like superman.
his dad came out and found me sleeping indian style on the couch with my cup balancing on my boobs. didn't spill a drop.
Take advantage man but know that every anal bead u drop inside her will make her love u 2% more. It's science
I paused mid sex to tell him I wished I'd taken up barrel racing so I could ride better.
He was super stoned and then he compared doing meth to having anal sex and told me to "ride that cowboy." The cowboy being my ex.
Nothing says male bonding like watching porn with your grandpa
well theres no bloody mary mix at the campus bookstore so i dont even know what its good for
IT TOOK ME LIKE AN HOUR TO DO THAT. DO YOU KNOW HOW HARD IT IS FOR ME TO CONCENTRATE ON ONE THING FOR AN ENTIRE HOUR?!
hopefully I won't be diving through a thorn bush to escape an explosion this time
It's starting to get sad how I have this 'new beginning' feeling after every negative pregnancy test
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