just tell him i said nine months
i just yelled "run, its godzirra!" to an asian kid who looked confused by the tornado alarm test
and that's how I found out my dad doesn't believe in towels... holiday magic.
Just saw 30+ dicks. Explain later.
Mother fucker. I'm a 30J now. I'm fucking speechless
Lesbians are nicde people they do not take debit cards
I'm sick of being the only unemployed member of the group. Doing things alone isn't partying. Its sad.
I'm still hoping for it dude. Random north dakota pussy. If my 16 year old self knew that these were my dreams he would so try to beat me up, and i think he could.
We were fucking while the tv was on, and one of those animal cruelty commercials came on. We then switched over and started doing it doggy style. It was then that I realized that I'm going to hell.
I can say with 87% certainty that i received one of the world's five greatest blow jobs since the Coolidge administration on Saturday night.
Yup. Dog walker, house sitter and mistress to the rich, bored and bi-curious. I've got a nice little operation running.
I have a present for you
Like a legit gift, not just me showing up and getting naked
I knew things were bad when my gyno recommended meditation.
I started keeping track of my period when I realized you had a better grasp of it than me.
I just talked to him. no worries he had the same fears you did this morning and smelled the dryer to make sure. you officially did not pee in there haha
Randomize
