I took Valium worth by frank. I squabble
Li shadha you vin. It's phot out. I just ate a fried Oreo
I'm like a new puppy, everybody wants to touch me
Being a slut is okay if you're being a polite slut, right?
Last time i carry you out of a forest
The last thing I remember was you puking all over the inside of my door and him yelling "PUKING RALLY!!!"
Btw: some husbands are not impressed by me trying to snap photos of their wives camel toe.
What made this night legendary was getting pulled over for looking suspicious while wearing an iron man mask
I think cutting a patient out of a owl costume is a first for those guys. It's a good story at least.
It was rough. I have dried puke in my hair and I don't know if it's mine or from the girl I met on the ground waiting for a cab.
Holy shit, I wanna ride him into the horizon.
i keep replaying things i did last night. and remembering new things. and its a constant cycle of torture
I walked into the bathroom and there's this 6'5" cop washing his hands. He looks at me and goes, "Heard you singing outside. Sound real pretty."
No more tequila EVER.
I have already been up, showered, had a cup of coffee brought to me, added a little rum to cure the hangover, had sex and kicked him out and it's only 1pm. Successful day so far.
I'll be honest, this year's Vegas trip will be nothing short of disappointing if there's no repeat of the angry ménage a trios in a closet.
Everything is fine, it's not hung over in here at all\n\n*Narrator* *but in fact everything was not fine*
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