Can Purell be used as lube?
8am blowjobs give a whole new meaning to morning breath..
people are starting to question the shark bite story
It's a good thing i didn't end up pregnant...i would have had to figure out his last name.
She wasnt impressed wen i brought a guy for her back with me, a 3am impromptu sperm donor is not a gd birthday present. Im a bad gf.
Did you hear me? I HAVE THE CONTENTS OF AN NBA PLAYER'S CONDOM IN MY BEDROOM TRASHCAN!! This shit is potentially worth millions of dollars to a fertile young female who is ovulating. How do I sell it fast??
he just sat there, in the doorway of my dorm room, chuggin a fifth like nobodys buisness.. don't know whether to fuck him or be afraid of his confidence
Trust me. Drunk Scrabble is not a good idea. Arguments over the legitimacy of the word "Pickle" break out, things are said, friendships are ruined. It's ugly.
I want to have sex with Will Smith. I guess I have a thing with 90s sitcom stars. Stamos, Joey Lawrence, John Goodman.
his mom fetish really needs to stop. this is literally the 5th time i've come home from work and there's been some random skank and her kids in the living room.
did one of the kids use their poo like a crayon on the wall this time?
how do i act around someone who's shoes i puked in while naked and blackout?
I was just dry heaving outside of the Chem building when a guided tour walked by. Welcome to the Maritimes kids...
I wish I was taller so I could give these boobs the publicity they deserve.
Having random cyber sex while watching to catch a predator just seems wrong.
My fuck it list is complete! I finally got a firefighter!
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