Am I allowed to make my facebook status "loves farting in chairs"? I think it would shock every boy that I am friends with.
When you're about to leave, tell him "bye." At that point, he should say something. If he doesn't say anything, well, our drinks were free and he gets a free make out with yours truly.
sorry about last night, I don't know what happened but I woke up this morning and looked strikingly similar to courtney love, it had to be bad.
I fucking love my neighbors. I offered him chocolate and somehow it turned into a sexual proposition.
I just want school to he over so we can build a big tent, do drugs inside it, and watch cartoons until the sun comes up.
That's all I've ever wanted.
Honestly I have a huge freedom boner right now and if I came it would be red white and blue
Oh by "being festive" I mean make tacos for dinner.
I know this is a weird question but we both had pants on when my mom woke us up last night right?
we got stoned then he started showing me how to make his penis look like a hamburger...if that's not true love idk what love is
A boy in some branch of the military kissed me I think I'm going through an American sniper phase
Many a woman has been in tears over the passing of my penis' whorish ways.
Joke’s on you. I got to talk to a furry about why nukes are bad and why musicals are good.
I purposely left my thong and accidentally left my ethics book, hairspray and most of my dignity.
I KEEP THINKING INAPPROPRIATE SEXUAL THOUGHTS ABOUT YOU AND I AM SORRY.
Of course he’s dumb. He’s got a 9 inch dick! There’s not enough blood in his body for a big dick and a big brain. It’s science
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