last night they convinced you that a sharpie was a new style of chap stick... so when you wake up, you might want to do something about that
I think the boy in my gender studies class cried when 90% of the girls said they had faked an orgasm
Dude they are all farmers and I'm pretty sure there's a prostitute here.
I cant prove it..but im almost positive that you were just outside my window watching me while eating out of a bag of Cheetos...
she gave me her number. found out it was already stored in my phone as "bathroom blowjob"
I feel like somebody took my brain out. Stomped on it with cleats. And then put it back together with a glue stick. Thank you.
Well then sir I'll probably see you tomorrow after my class and at 3 with your clothes off. Sounds like a solid way to start the weekend to me
HOW DO I ALWAS FIND THEM?! THERE WAS BE A SOCIETY OF SMALL PENISED MEN AND I MUST BELONG TO IT!
her wearing orange crocs at the bar was definitely a great form of contraception
By the end of the first quarter he was so hammered he was pouring beer into the crockpot with the miniature hot dogs and BBQ sauce saying he loved the supper bowl and he loves taking mini weinies to the face
Depending on which video of him streaking you watch, you can see me passed out in the front row.
You were definitely drunk. You gave him an otphj in front of everyone.
I cried over the lack of milkshakes I've consumed in the last month
This drink tastes like mosquito repellent.
He said I have the “Denzel Washington” of vaginas.
Randomize
