Why does Thanksgiving make hot girls feel disgusting and fat girls feel horny? Its killing my prospects.
so literally, as soon as i tripped and fell and hit the floor the earthquake started. hows THAT for a self esteem boost?
Just finished texting the 27th male name in my phone that i don't recognize. none of them were the hott kid i made out with last night. the search continues.
gpnpr hd vmdd nm the ggrl whm was mn my lar
I need you to use more vowels.
He burst into tears while I was blowing him. NEVER giving a bj for a graduation present again.
Im chasing shots of tequila with chocolate milk right now. by myself. its nasty, but I've had worse in tjere the past couple days, so ill take it.
All I want is a guy who will love me and occasionally shave my balls.
Guess who just got a Christian Beliefs class to seriously discuss the spiritual implications of dolphin rape?
Btw. Being a stripper for a week without anyone knowing to pay off my school loan is no longer in my agenda.
He fingered me in a Waffle House bathroom and then stole a traffic cone. Is this love that I'm feeling?
You just gave me the title for the series of our lives. Haha. Chapter 12: the cocaine on the back of the hairbrush
i have a strong feeling that today will be a naked day for me...i don't feel like doing shit
breakfast this morning: omelette, Valium and baileys hot chocolate
Now that sounds like the breakfast of champions
I feel like the physical embodiment of the pot leaf eyes smiley face
I’m literally naked drinking a beer and I gotta leave in 6 minutes for work lol
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