I like to think it a success when the cops are called
East Village: Only place you can play pac man while eating a pineapple hotdog, go to the bar next door and see a graphic blowjob on every tv
Whoa!!! Accidentally took a dump in chick's bathroom at Red Robin. 1 hr for coast to be clear. Women's farts sound like geese taking last breath. Liars.
I just want to know how you cleaned her puke off the twister mat with no gloves. And didn't throw up
we need to get ahold of those "sexting" teens on tyra. HAWT!
wasnt one 13?
I saw an Asian dude carrying a patchwork denim purse get into a car with two rednecks at the grocery store tonight. Imagine what I could have seen if I had actually done something interesting.
know what turns me on? long, stringy hair on a pasty looking girl with an overstuffed backpack and kneepads over her jeans in case she falls off her scooter
your less of a man for seeing that
I woke up and found cookies in my purse. It's a 12/12/12 miracle.
I woke up with my name tag for work still on my shirt. It was a rough night.
He tried to get me to go back to his place on the condition that he has 6 cats. I was very tempted but I said no. Hoping to go see the cats tomorrow
after we got done having sex, you rolled over and ask what your yelp review was. So yea I'm kinda mad.
so i showed up to the bars in a sombrero and a tie as a headband... so yeah, they didn't let me in
i like beer, sex, and cooking. what more can he want?
These snow days are takeing a toll on my liver
Had a moment of weakness, slept with my ex last night
So that's why our room smells like tequila and shame.
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