you want me
i'd rather choke on a dick.
i turned job hunting into a drinking game..
since when did accompanying a guy to a wedding mean that anal was required that night?
I just found 3 condoms in my math textbook... in the probability section... Under dependent and independent events...
About to find out how well alcohol and lazer tag mix.
I may be the first guy in history to get dome while watching An Extremely Goofy Movie.
All you kept saying was "my dick ALWAYS causes problems".
yes we did fuck in his chapter room. yes it was demeaning. and yes, they probably will discuss it at chapter tonight.
I fell alseep but then some dude picked me up. Comforter and all stuck a blunt in my mouth and carried me back downstairs because "I wasn't done partying"
I apologize for excluding you. On a better note: the stripper that made out with my wife friend requested me on facebook
I filled two of the glass ornaments in my mom's bathroom last night with vodka. That way no one sees me drinking on Christmas. Alcoholic or genius? All I know it makes bathroom trips frequent and enjoyable.
In that case, I'll try 2 find a date. But my options are AA friends or fuck buddies.
The best part about drinking boxed wine is you can blow up the bag and use it as a pillow
By early evening I was shouting at the deeply Christian girl to suck my dick inbetween snorting lines of gatorade powder.
Phil and I agree that the level of sand in your vagina rivals that of many of the earth's largest deserts
Randomize
