Damn I can't remmbre the last tome I had sobr sex
Um. I believe with my boyfriend, slut
Fuck. Wron person. But yea
You got in a fight last night?
Yeah! Some dude in the bathroom...he was standing there and I notice he's got the same shirt as me on so I'm like...dude you should have called me, we look like idiots...he didn't say anything...so i got pissed and hit him...completely decimated and my hand was all bloody and covered with glass afterward...weird dude, never saw him again that night or since.
Um...Did this guy happen to look almost exactly like you?
I really want to sleep with her friend. I'm hoping our casual sex relationship will somehow lead to that.
fyi, if youre wondering if offering a female police officer sexual favors will get you out of a ticket, the answer is no.
Of course he got arrested. He was wearing a toga. Even Tom Hanks couldn't act sober in a toga.
she's a gynecology student. i don't know if my dick's ready for that kind of pressure.
The woman at the nail salon waxing my lip just showed me the strip with all the hair on it while smirking. Apparenltly 'you have a stache' can be communicated through a language barrier.
There is this threesome scene that is literally 10 minutes of straight fucking
Omg so it's educational?
If you need us, Zoe and I will be on my kitchen floor drinking Gatorade and crying
She sleeps with her hand around my balls. First I thought it was just a comfort thing. Now I think it's to make sure I can't slip away in the middle of the night.
Holy shit, I just successfully took and sent a boob pic AT MY DESK I have conquered an entire new level of skill.
I woke up in his bed wearing nothing but a penn state hat. We are....
gay sex achievement: unlocked
what
you told me you were going out for groceries!!
I love you as a roommate, but you GOTTA start using the door dude..
Can you send me the picture of me licking the cows udders?
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