Raging hang over. 6AM finish. Shat on a bag of trash in an alley. D L that last bit.
My therapist says she wants to work on my 'trust issues'. I think she's found the cash cow within.
I like one night stands...theyre like crushes for big kids
when my professor asked "does anyone know what streches across south america" and a kid in the back row said "my exgirfriends vagina" i knew i was at home.
Dude. The walls are totally staring at me right now. I told you this was a bad idea.
I am way too high for this. Some guy just keeps talking about music and life goals and he apparently has lived in every city we mention we are going
I should have but it might be too early in this fuckbuddyship to emasculate him
Considering the fact that you wouldn't give me my cat last night because he was "destined for broadway", yeah, I'm accusing you of stealing him
Swallowing. Like you said. Lions. Always.
Drank a fosters this weekend and last weekend. Listening to down under 5 times a day. Spent 100 dollars on a sleeveless men at work shirt circa 1983. We don't leave for another 5 weeks. I call it pregaming.
It's a sign that no dudes december is about to start: I have a yeast infection.
id one day like to live in a world full of emotionless and wonderfully fullfilling sex...
Whoever decided to put a Denny's that close to the strip club is a genius.
Who loses their virginity to fucking Flo Rida
The coast is clear - also, would it bother you if I chose not to wear pants?
Randomize
