people and things i regret. that's what i want to do tonight.
i only understood the part that said mucho orgasmos
i woke up and the dog was eating spaghetti off my chest.
All I remember is him trying to go down on me, but I guess I was too busy making out with his brother
UPDATE: WE WILL BE HITTING THE BATMAN PINATA WITH A SWORD
Okay good. I don't want another mom thinking I got their daughter pregnant.
He autographed my vag. This fuck just got authentic.
Also I just had a flash back ... He told me I have nice nipples and then asked me about yours..
Don't be too mad at the guy who broke your kitchen table. Didn't get his name, but he knew all about your gay porn career. Like DETAILS...
but seriously, if you see a redhead running down the street tonight in a carrot costume, call 911. He's tripping hard.
Tbh the only thing I was fully concerned about from the dream was what type of fucked up parallel universe doesn't have Coca-Cola
Booty called 3 guys from my hospital bed
WHY HAVE SO MANY THING GONE IN MY BUTT ON THIS TRIP
You've reached your one pic per night limit. To increase your limit, start conversations before 9 and submit your request for an additional pic before 10.
Dude, she stopped mid blow job to ask the cat's name. ADHD might be a deal breaker after all.
Randomize
