I must be too annoying 4 u.
There are many reasons why he shouldn't come over. And each one is longer than his penis.
On my way home right now. I miss you. let's cuddle. whiskey.
shes the only person ive ever met that could make "i don't swallow" sound sexy
These pubs in Ireland act like hand jobs aren't the universal currency
I have been drinking at the bar so long today that I literally just found a spiderweb from my leg to the bar.
dizzyuy bat. 3.453 lkos. hoit sx, now im single. blackouteed
I puked in the urinal of a bar tonight. Not embarrassed cause I got away with it, legitimately upset you weren't there to make fun of me.
Just checked my voicemails on the work phone on speaker. Thank you so much for the one of you screaming "COME FUCK ME NOWWWW!" my boss loved it ..
Hmmm. I never knew the difference. I've done either one and had stronger or weaker versions but usually if i took enough, i tripped balls. That should be a PSA for kids... if you take drugs and the drugs are weak, just take more drugs... The More You Know
Found an old burrito under my bed
You are a sick fuck
Well, I dont really know how much penis you have at your disposal so I cant be sure
Your next boyfriend should be from MENSA...you're so smart, it's intimidating as fuck. My penis retracted in fear.
I don't know where you went, but if you're anywhere near the liquor, pour me another drink
I don't remember anything from last night, but at track I found my thong next to the high jump pit... So it must has been decent
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