my affection for youporn is starting to get disturbing... i just thought about sending them a christmas card
Please come to History lecture. The kid two seats over is belligerently drunk.
I'm graduating. Then you'll never see me again.
We better fuck soon then
I just googled if crying burns calories
As i lay in bed, clutching my face, i'm starting to believe your dick in my eye story.
We carried on a casual conversation about plants while I gave him a hand job.
I really need to find a new way to reward you other than head scratches, nutella and blowjobs.
How do I tell her I need the lights out when I'm getting head because she and my mom share a perm color
I want your cock.
All we are is dust in the wiiiiiiinnnnnnnnnnd
Nothing says male bonding like watching porn with your grandpa
i don't know what body building stuff he's on, but his cum is basically a 5 hour energy shot.
If I had a dick, I'd stick it in some Oreo pancakes
okay, but you can't tell anyone. Every time he instagrams something with the caption "avocado," it means he's booty calling me. Happy?
Watching the series finale of Friends and crying in my Thai food. I don't like hangover Jared.
Normally getting fucked up with the owner and suggesting he motorboat me wouldn’t help my chances of a promotion, but this is 2020 and he definitely enjoyed it
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