how was that guy you hooked up with?
i used to think blowing a .05 was a good thing
The sex was so good, I called my ex during the 2nd time just so he could hear. Is that mean?
Just made out with the bride... She was still in her dress & I was still in my bridesmaid dress, how's that for an album picture?!?
he kept whispering yes yes yes yes the entire 15 minutes. i almost wish it was a quickie.
I ended up giving him head, i think it was mostly a defensive move so that he wouldn't discover i was wearing those onesy spanx
I swear it started with good intentions but then my slutty side took over and we started playing strip checkers
you spent the rest of the night making a recipe for mixed drink called "the new years bowel remover". it has 13 parts but judging from the bold all caps, the boiled avocado is the most important
I was rolling balls and tried to donate blood as an act of kindness to the sick person who would receive it
Nothing bad can happen when you have a kiwi flavored condom. Absolutely nothing.
If I end up in a healthy relationship because of this, I will NEVER forgive you!!!
I turned around and there were three 10 year old kids running around with sparklers. Weirdest college part ever.
Welcome to Philly.
You're wearing pigtails and giving away our kitchen appliances. Clearly, you're drunk.
Annoying and petty is the name of the game and I'm the MVP.
I'm going to be such a slut in Europe I've already decided
Send me dick pics. We'll make a scrap book
I told him to not try to hang out with me ever again and now I regret it Bc im bleeding through my uterus and just want him to suck on my aching nipples
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